Aislinn's birth story

I have somehow lost Aislinn's original birth story that I wrote not long after she was born. I know at least two places I thought I posted it; one of those places I KNOW I posted it was hit by a hacker earlier this year, and the other, it simply isn't there. Maybe I never put it there. But it's gone now. This is my best re-creation. As with Audrey's birth story, this is a fairly long post.

It was late. We had come home from a birthday party that night and got Audrey in bed, and we were now relaxing in bed, watching the news and then Jay Leno. I'd had hopes for weeks that this baby would come early, because I was SO tired of being pregnant. So unlike my pregnancy with Audrey. I did get tired of being pregnant at the end with her, but with this one, I'd been ready for months. Since we were once again planning a home birth, I was hoping for just a little early. Tonight, my due date was two weeks away.

I felt a little trickle, but doubted it was anything. Still, I looked at Leo...and he looked back at me. "No..." he whispered. "I don't know..." I answered. "I just felt a little...no, I think I just need to go to the bathroom." I shifted in bed, rolling my huge body towards the edge, and as I did, I felt it again, an unmistakable trickle of fluid.

"Uh oh..." I grabbed the towel I had been lying on in anticipation of this eventuality. It wasn't needed. Though my water had indeed broken, I only felt one more brief trickle. It was not urine, and it was clear, so things looked good so far.

But I couldn't believe it! Despite wanting this baby to come early, I did not feel prepared. Baby clothes were still out in the shed, waiting to be sorted and put in the new dresser. And it was so late at night! With Audrey, my water had broken in the afternoon, and she was born before midnight the same day. I was going to have to go through labor at night, and I was afraid if the labor went long this time, I would be worn out from lack of sleep. I did not want to have to transfer to the hospital.

Not only that, but the midwife I had hired months ago was out of town. Her mother had recently had a stroke, and M. had been back and forth between here and Kentucky several times over the last couple of weeks until her mother finally passed earlier that week. She was not planning to be back until the following Monday. Her assistant was on-call for her, and though I liked A. and had met her a couple of times, I was disappointed that once again, the midwife I had hired would not be the one attending my baby's birth.

And one more important thing was not ready: the pool. I was again planning a water birth, and Audrey's had gone so well, the warm water easing the contractions so amazingly, I was looking forward to another relaxing water birth. But the original inflatable kiddie pool I had used with Audrey's birth was long gone, having graduated to its original purpose and springing an unrepairable leak the summer Audrey was a year old. I had ordered a replacement online several weeks before, and after waiting for weeks I discovered I had sent the pool to Illinois instead of Indiana. I quickly ordered a replacement, hoping it would arrive in time. That was less than a week before now. The pool had not yet arrived.

Now that my water had broken, the contractions began. "I don't want to do this TONIGHT!" I complained to Leo. But labor waits for no one, not even unprepared mothers.

I told Leo to rest and sleep while he could. I called the midwife, A., to let her know my water had broken but that contractions were still only about 10 minutes apart. I spent the night in the living room, watching TV, listening to Norah Jones, and timing contractions until I got too sleepy. I tried sleeping between contractions, and wasn't entirely unsuccessful. The paper I wrote the times down on shows clearly when I started to fall asleep, as my handwriting became more and more illegible. I finally decided to stop writing them down unless they started getting more intense, and rested (though without truly sleeping) between them as best I could. Around 5:30 I decided to call my parents so they could get on the road for the two-hour drive from their house. They had been here for Audrey's birth, and now they would hang out with her while we waited.

I think I called A. again sometime around...6:30? 7:30? Just to check in again. Contractions were still quite easy, though not easy enough to sleep through. My parents arrived around 8:30. Shortly after that, my contractions started slowing down...way down. They were now 15 minutes apart, then 20, then 30. By mid-morning, they had all but petered out completely. Now I was frustrated. Now that it was daytime and I felt more confident about laboring after getting at least a little rest, labor was slowing down. I called A. again. She came by on her way up to visit another client to check me. I don't remember now how far I was dilated, but I think it was reasonable, if not terribly impressive. She advised me to rest and sleep as much as possible so that when labor did pick up again, I would be ready for it. I decided that made sense. My first impulse was to walk and move around to try to get things going, but truthfully I could use a little more rest. Since contractions had virtually stopped, I could actually sleep now.

I slept for a couple of hours until about lunchtime. Ate lunch. Rested some more after lunch. Audrey had AWANA to attend at church that evening, so I planned for mom and dad to take her to McDonalds for dinner and then to church. I decided it was time to walk. When the amniotic sac has broken, the chances of infection increase the longer labor takes. Since I was laboring at home, among bacteria my body was used to, my chances were less. But I wanted to take no chance of a transfer if I could avoid it. So Leo and I set out on our first of several walks we would take around the neighborhood that evening.

And it worked! After a few hours of walking, with breaks in between, I felt the contractions start to pick up again. I timed them as we walked, and was pleased to see them getting closer together.

Audrey came home after church, glad that the baby had not come without her. We sent her off to bed, and I set out for one more walk...I think maybe with my mom this time. This time I could feel the contractions becoming more intense. I had to actually slow down for some of them. This was it! I knew it was going to happen this night.

When we got home, I called A. once more to let her know things were picking up, and she said to call her when they were five minutes apart. She had about an hour to drive to get to our house, so she wanted plenty of time to get here.

By 10:00 or so, things were getting very intense. I decided to try the bathtub, since, despite all hope, the pool had still not arrived that day (it would finally arrive four days after the baby was born). I just could not get comfortable in the bathtub. The pool had tall, soft sides. The tub's were short and hard. The water just could not get deep enough to cover my belly, which is how deep it needs to be to provide maximum relief. I started groaning during contractions, and decided it was time for A. to come. After we called her, I felt back labor begin. OH. JOY. There is nothing like back labor. My back had bothered me throughout this whole pregnancy, and it was only fitting that it should end in a crescendo of back pain. Nothing helped. I had Leo press as hard as he could on my hips until he was afraid he was going to break them. I longed for a deep water. Norah Jones sang for me to come away with her, and I thought, fine, anywhere, just so long as there is a deep kiddie pool with warm water in it.

A. arrived, and I started feeling nauseated. I had thrown up in labor with Audrey, so I knew it could happen. I yelled "BUCKET!" and it was shoved under my face. After twisting and turning and trying to get comfortable in the tub, I decided to get out. I made my way to the bedroom where chux pads and towels were spread out on the floor at the foot of the bed. Our bed at the time did not have a headboard, and I wanted something to brace my back against. So the foot of the bed it was. I asked for a pillow behind my back, and I was set.

I decided it was time to wake Audrey up if she wanted to watch. My mom brought her in, and she immediately ran for Leo. The plan had been for Mom to be responsible for her so Leo could help me, but I wanted her to be comfortable enough to stay, even if that meant losing a little support. M.'s apprentice, S., was also there, so I was doing ok on support anyway. As my contractions intensified and my groans got louder, Audrey became more and more agitated. When I started crowning, she decided it was too much and decided she wanted to go out and color with Grammy. I couldn't blame her. Birth is a very intense, freaky thing, watching a new person come out of another person.

It wasn't long after then that we met our new baby for the first time, very early in the morning. A. later told me that, as the baby was born, a huge gush of blood and clots flowed out unlike anything she had ever seen, and she was very concerned for a brief moment. But it was soon apparent that there was no problem. We rubbed the baby's back to get it to breathe, as it seemed a little blue. It cried, and opened it's eyes and I thought to myself, "I know you. I know you!" This baby looked so much like Audrey, for a moment I wondered if it was all a dream and this was still my first birth!

We didn't know the sex yet, though I'd had a strong boy vibe throughout most of the pregnancy. Audrey agreed with me for most of the pregnancy, but at the end changed her mind and declared it was a girl. In the end, she was right. We were going to wait a bit to check for "parts", but as I shifted the baby to move the cord to a better position so we could cut it, I inadvertently saw before we were ready. I gasped, and looked at Leo. "It's a GIRL! I can't believe it! I was sure it was a boy all this time!" I had actually been hoping for a boy, but in that split second of realization, it just didn't matter. She was here, she was gorgeous, she was ours. And that was all that mattered.

After a few minutes I stood up and put a little more clothing on so my dad could come in with mom and Audrey to see the new baby. We have a fantastic picture, though a bit dark, of Audrey sitting in our bed next to me, proudly holding her new baby sister.

This pregnancy, this birth, and Aislinn herself were so different than "previous experience", as I tend to word it (so as not to give Audrey a complex!). The pregnancy was harder. The labor was far earlier, but longer, than Audrey's had been. And the birth itself was harder, even though labor had been much easier. I had trouble pushing with Aislinn. I could not seem to get on top of the contractions, did not feel I was pushing effectively. In the end, though, I DID NOT TEAR, which was also different from before (I needed a couple of stitches after Audrey was born). And I think this is why my first week postpartum was far easier than it had been after Audrey. For a week after Audrey was born, I felt like my insides were going to fall out, I was sore, and did not want to move around at all. But this time...I was walking around Walmart shopping for a carseat the very next day, I kid you not. I felt great. I felt so great that A. finally told me I needed to slow down if I didn't want to crash in a few weeks (I saw the wisdom of this after a few days!).

And Aislinn...such an easy baby. God knew what I needed this time. Audrey was and still is pretty high-maintenance. She nursed every two hours or LESS the first nine months of her life, including at night. Aislinn was quite happy to go three hours from the start, and occasionally had to be woken up to nurse in her early weeks. She did not require me to hold her 24/7. A year later, she still does not truly sleep through the night, but she does let me get four hours at a stretch.

I'm thankful and blessed by both of my children. Each of their births was unique and I will never forget either of them